snagglebox

The Great DIY Weighted Blanket Experiment

Attie doing a puppet show for me while I wrote this post.

I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to consider a weighted blanket for my kids.

Maybe because they’ve always been good at settling in at night... until we moved house last year and Attie had a room of his own for the first time. He doesn’t like this one little bit, and it’s been a nightly struggle to get him to conquer his fear of being alone. Finding the right kind of night light, leaving a fan on for white noise, letting the dog sleep in his room. Letting the dog sleep on his bed. Letting the dog sleep on the floor when they argued over who got the pillow.

As I chatted over coffee with a couple of friends, both occupational therapists, they lamented the imminent closure of a program they’d worked hard to get up and running.

The misconception that autistic people are overly trusting by nature is, like all stereotypes, a sweeping statement that is only true for some. I am not one of them.

Like most people, as a kid I readily accepted what people told me about themselves and the world, without much reason or desire to question it. Or at least that’s how it must have appeared on the outside.

On the inside I was free-falling, desperately clinging to the belief that people were reliable.

Recently I was reading a post by my friend Lexi at Mostly True Stuff about the many things that make us feel like we’re crappy parents. She called it the Motherhood Box of Shame, and one of the things that puts her in there is Pinterest.

And boy, do I know what that’s like.

I just love the dude in the purple shirt.

So... I took a month off from blogging and social media, partly to avoid the autism ‘awareness’ month onslaught but mostly to take some time to power down and give myself a break from the sensory and emotional overload that blogging can sometimes bring.

The break has been amazingly productive. Did you guys know that there’s a whole world out there that doesn’t fit inside my computer? I’ve been getting stuff done. Here’s an update.

Hey guys! I'm still taking a self-imposed (and much-needed) break from all things online, but I thought I'd share this post from the archives that looks at the difference between atypical and dysfunctional behaviour.

Just because a behaviour is uncommon doesn't necessarily mean that it's a problem...

When Does Different Become Dysfunctional

Repost: How To Include Autistic Kids in Field Sports Day

It's that time of year again! The post-winter/summer school field sports day. I have to say, apart from photo day this was probably the most dreaded event on the whole school calendar for me.

Here's a post I wrote last year that will come in handy if you've got kids or students who might struggle with events like these.

How To Include Autistic Kids in Field Sports Day

A Letter To My Kids: You Are Not A Puzzle

Hey guys!

Wow, you’re growing up really fast. Well you’re growing at the same rate you always have, but that’s just something old people like me say when their kids grow taller than them.

You’re spending a lot more time on the internet now, so I want to talk to you about some of the stuff you might find there. You know how we talk about autism a lot at home? Well people on the internet like to talk about it too, especially during April because it’s Autism Awareness Month.

Let’s face it, school can be really tough for many autistic kids and as their parents it can feel like an exhausting never-ending struggle to get them what they need.

If this sounds familiar then at some point you’ve probably wondered whether homeschool might be a better option... and then you hid under the bed because the thought of being wholly responsible for your kids’ education is scary as hell.

When it comes to talking about respite for special needs parents, the most common piece of advice seems to be 'It's important to take time out for yourself away from the kids’.

But there’s something about this that I really want to know...

A reluctance to make eye contact is one of the most recognized features of autism, and yet it’s also one of the most commonly misunderstood.

Never interrupt me while I'm climbing the Cliffs of Insanity

The way autistic kids play is often called unusual because it’s different to what you see in typically developing kids - there’s less role playing, they can become obsessed with a particular type of toy or just one part of it and often play with objects that aren't traditionally considered to be toys.

But is that a problem? When should we be lending autistic kids a hand with their play, and how do we do that?

Many parents wait with bated breath for their child to say 'I love you'. It’s one of those moments that we’re promised in the Happy Family brochure, so we all hop on the parenting train with those three little words as one of the destinations.

But you know what?

Not hearing 'I love you' is not a tragedy.

Families with autistic kids need help, and a lot of it. But it can be really hard sometimes for other family members and friends to know exactly what kinds of support are needed.

The good news is that there are tons and tons of ways you can help. Yes, tons!

So if you've ever said "I really want to help but I don't know how"... then this is the post for you. Behold, an awesomely big list.

Last week my best friend Lisa made me cry like a baby by posting this letter on my Facebook wall. It surprised the hell out of me - we've been friends for nearly 20 years and I had no idea that she felt this way.

In the many years since my kids were diagnosed I've seen a lot of friendships disappear, but I will fight to my dying day to keep this one. If you have friends or family with special needs kids, please fight to keep them in your lives. They need you.

If you’ve ever experienced the overwhelming stress and confusion of a meltdown you’ll understand why they’re often considered to be one of the most challenging of all autistic behaviours.

But did you know that meltdowns are not unique to autism?

Are you a parent, teacher or caregiver who is struggling to cope with meltdowns?

You're not alone. Meltdowns are common amongst kids with autism or sensory processing disorders, and can be a frightening, confusing, frustrating and exhausting experience for everybody involved.

The key to managing meltdowns is not only understanding why they happen and how to intervene, it's being able to remember what to do when you're smack dab in the middle of all that stress and chaos.

And that's exactly what The Super Useful Guide To Managing Meltdowns is all about - a proactive approach to taking control ahead of time so you can help everyone make it through, including yourself.

When Attie was younger his preferred method for dealing with overwhelming situations was to run away... and since almost everything in his day was overwhelming for him, this meant he was constantly bolting for the nearest door.

And he’s not alone - it’s common to hear words like escape artist and runner used to describe autistic kids. This need to run off, seek out or explore other places is called wandering and recent data suggests it’s much more common than previously realized.